When people register for their baby shower or wedding, the idea behind it is to get them things they would need and reduce the number of duplicate gifts. Somewhere along the way it became almost understood that you were required to buy off the wedding registry or baby registry. There are multiple problems with this way of gifting and I will go into that, but the bottom line here is that wedding gifts and baby gifts are just that...gifts.
When you buy someone a gift, you are not buying out of obligation. You are buying because you want to express your love and appreciation for the relationship you share with those people. Obligation buying means you are at a wedding or baby shower that you really need not be at. Nobody should buy out of a perceived obligation.
If you are creating a baby registry or wedding registry, it is important for you to remember that the purpose of the registry is not to "command" what gifts you expect to receive. The registry is to alert people to your PREFERENCES, not your requirements.
Another glaring issue with being forced to buy from the registry is the fact that everyone does not share the same financial ability. Some people can afford to buy that $200 cake knife from an expensive shop and others think that is absurd. How can you force everyone to buy from the same store? It is great as a suggestion and that is all that it should be....a suggestion.
There are plenty of websites out there that say off-registry buying is a no-no but I completely disagree. What about originality? What about that wonderful surprise? What about homemade gifts that were crafted with these two hands? Mittens and blankets are wonderful options that can be crocheted at home and mean a great deal more than any store bought gifts.
Although the idea of a registry is a good one, it should not be forced upon anyone. The simple fact is, some people are more likely to use a registry and some are more interested in finding that elusive, special gift. Allow those people the space to come up with something incredible.
Weddings and baby showers are both momentous occasions that deserve a bit of spontaneity. Don’t paint us gift buyers into a corner with rules and regulations! We want to buy something that came from our own minds. We are special that way.
Likewise, if someone buys a gift off the registry, there is nothing rude about them doing so. Even if the gift is a 6' tall ceramic purple dinosaur, accept the gift graciously!
The next time you go to buy a wedding gift or a baby shower gift, I want you to consider what kind of gift buyer you are. Are you the type that likes to be given your answer, or do you like to create your own question? Buy accordingly and feel good about doing it!
