Seeing as I am older than dirt, you might not remember this line from the movie "Fame", spoken by the shocking full-head-of-hair Paul McCrane (of ER-helicopter-magnet fame)
The truth is, I don't think about gay people that often. I look at that as a good thing.
It's a good thing because it means that I can't claim to be "tolerant" of gay people. That claim is nothing but a big "Yabbutt", as in "Yabbut I still don't want them showering in the same locker room as my child". Claiming to be "tolerant" is, in my nevertobehumble opinion, a smokescreen. Kind of like saying "I love you - but you are going to Hell"
Nor can I claim to be "intolerant"...mainly because I have no problem with people who are gay.
Bottom line? I don't care one way or another who a person chooses to have sex with, so long as both partners are adults and the sex is consensual. Period. The End.
So it pisses me off that I have been pretty much forced to listen to a bunch of anti-gay rhetoric in the last week or so.
It started when gay marriage in California FINALLY became a reality. It continued on Sunday when my normally-even-keeled Priest (did I mention that I'm Catholic) completely lost his shit...to the point where his spittle almost landed on me in the 15th pew. It culminated last night while watching "30 Days" on FX
So allow me to rant speak to this issue:
- I know that 62% of Californians opposed gay marriage. Thank God California has a constitution in place that protects its citizens from the tyranny of the majority. Contrary to popular opinion, "majority rules" is NOT how it works in this country. Thank those wise old dead white guys who drafted the Constitution for that. Think back to the days immediately following 9-11. Think of what you heard on talk radio, etc. How easy do you think it would have been to get 62% of Americans to want to round of the Muslims and inter them in camps (although Bush is well on his way to that with Gitmo, but I digress...)? Bowing to that will would have been just as wrong as bowing to the will of the 62% of Californians.
- The "insitution" of marriage is not threatened in any way. Marriage is both a legal contract and a religious one (for some). Laws ensuring the rights of gays to marry only address the legal side. If you object to gay marriage because you believe that God finds it wrong, then fear not! Nobody is forcing priests to marry homosexual couples. Hell - you can't even force my priest to perform a marriage between a Catholic and a Protestant! You can rest easy, secure in the fantasy knowledge that only your marriage "counts" because it has been blessed by a member of the clergy.
- I'm still waiting for one of these "institution of marriage" people to tell me EXACTLY how their specific marriage is threatened by Jim & Steve or Ann & Liz getting hitched on the other side of the country. I've tried to see their side...I really have. I just don't see me turning gay, leaving Brad and sleeping with BestFriendMommy just because some same-sex marriages happened. Is it just me?
- I've known same-sex male and same-sex female couples who are raising children. Let's see...what should we call them? An abomination? No - doesn't quite cut it. Unnatural? Doesn't work either. I know! How about A FAMILY! You know what the real problem is with those families? Because their union is not protected by law, if the couple splits up after 12 years of raising a child together, the non-biological parent (or the not-on-the-adoption-papers-parent, as many states don't allow gay couples to adopt as a "unit") is shit-out-of-luck. Unless their ex is feeling magnanimous, they can (and often are) effectively cut out of that child's life. And unlike hetero couples, they didn't have the option to get married to secure their rights to a child they consider their own....not in 48 states they don't.
- And before anyone says it, yes there are "horror stories" of gay parents "flaunting" their "lifestyle" (which I assume means "breathing and not hiding in shame in a closet") in front of their children. And that they have the temerity to raise children who don't see being gay as something so bad that as a teen you put a gun in your mouth and pull the trigger. Clearly they must be stopped! But before we do that, can we do something about all those "traditional" parents that are producing children that they later abuse/pimp out for drugs/beat/starve/just generally don't love? Call me crazy, but that seems more important than protecting kids from being raised not to be ashamed of themselves.
- "Following God's Will" is not something that we do in this country....at least, it's not something on which we are supposed to base our laws, including our laws governing marriage. If you are so inclined, you may base your daily life on that. You may raise your children to do so (and hope that they follow your wishes when they grow up). Before you run off half-cocked (or even full-cocked) trying to get laws passed that fall in line with your belief of how God wants things done, remember this...The Church of The Flying Spaghetti Monster is growing in size. If they becomes the majority, are you willing to follow laws based on what they believe? How about something a little less far-fetched: Islam is the fastest growing religion in the world. Polygamy anyone?
I've neglected this blog lately to the point that very few people will probably read this. But that's ok. In the past I have written things mainly beause I knew that they would provide amusement to my (rapidly dwindling) readers.
This one was for me.
And now since I can't get the movie "Fame" out of my head....[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7acuzKu7ag]
Tara R.
I think it's awesome that you found a way to bring the Church of the Spaghetti Monster into this discussion. I have to say I agree with all you've said.
Growing up in a Southern Baptist home, I was face with more than my share of homophobia. Yet, I have a difficult time understanding how two people in a loving, supportive, nurturing relationship can be wrong and two in an abusive, destructive and horrific one is not if based solely on their gender.
Nicely done!
Lara
Perfectly awesome rant. I agree wholeheartedly. I am always a bit surprised and quite relieved when sanity prevails as happened in California.
Karen
Well stated. And I completely agree.
daisybug
Sorry if this sounds gay (RDRRR) but I think I love you, Min... Bravissimo! I couldn't have said it any better myself! 🙂
Gettysburg Mom
Great post. I'm often amazed at the reasons people are against gay marriage. I once knew someone who argued it just wasn't the definition of marriage. Ummm... definitions change to match society. Again, great post!
Pammy Girl
Guess what? My great great great grandfather (1855) was a polygamist. I'm not proud of this but at least my family came from the first wife (very important to note that). Do I agree with polygamy? Hell no! But whatever.
I once saw a quote that said, "There are more heterosexual marriages that offend me than homosexual unions... so I didn't vote for your silly amendment."
Couldn't have said it better myself.
Emily
Bravo! Very well put!
I'm lucky that my pastor and our synod all support any one who seeks God, regardless of who they are or where they came from. But then again, I DO live in San Francisco 😉
Maria
*standing ovation*
Say What?
Bravo! (or with respect to the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster: "Oregano!")
Well put! Wish I could have said it that well!
Mr Lady
Pretending like my feelings for you were wishy washy (they aren't), all you would have had to do it say something about the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster to ensure my abject devotion. well done.
Also, I agree with every other point, too. But damn, the monster....